i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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