So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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