good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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