going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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