You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
