I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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