So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize
