no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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