I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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