i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
