i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
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