Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Randomize
