I'm gonna have a badass scar
I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
