at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
