On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
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