so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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