If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
