We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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