Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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