He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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