put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
if only i could text you this smell
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Randomize
