i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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