Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
