So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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