New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
