PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
No subtext here. People are naked.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
