a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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