I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
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