i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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