omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
farters have to be the big spoon...
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
