If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Randomize
