I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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