Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize