New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
