Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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