when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
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