I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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