I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
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