You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Randomize
