I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
