Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize