Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Randomize
