He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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