Christians are straight up FREAKS
I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
