finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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