He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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