Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
