I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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