Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
