Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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