Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
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