I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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