I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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